Community (Oct 5th)

Beautiful-sharing from our community:

paperdolls

I am finding there is freedom to be had if I can remain here and now. I am killing myself trying to arrange and rearrange the future and the past.

 

I have been making time for daily meditation within the chaos of life, children, work… I notice such a difference with how I show up to the outer world, when I make time to show up for my inner world.


Community ~ Ask & Respond

redefine my self.jpg

FOR CONSIDERATION: “Trying to redefine myself by my own definition rather than the definition I have created for everyone else…”

RESPONSE(S):

§§   That can be a tough one, I myself struggle with it. For me, it takes a period of time to be very clear about what I want, and need. Once I have a clear understanding of that, it’s much easier for me to see both versions of myself, the one that’s my true self, and the one who wants to be what I think the world/society thinks I should be. From there my definition becomes easier to assume as I feel much better about being true to my own compass and path to trod!! The path that I try to portray to others, rarely, if ever feels right, or fulfilling!!

§§   I attempt to redefine who I am by expressing who I want to be when I am around others. I find that the kinder and more genuine I am to other people, the kinder I am to myself.

§§   When I seek to define myself more clearly or know myself better, I go into nature or at least outside, and ask the question, “who was I when I was little? what brought me joy? what was important to me?” The answers usually arrive with peace and a remembering in my body that these things are my truth, and being authentic brings me joy. When I see that I have been defining myself or behaving in certain ways for others, it is very hard for me to stop because I want their attention and love. But, I have learned to remind myself, “This is me and if what I want or need doesn’t fit with others, that is ok. I would rather be alone and be me, than play at being false.” There is so much more in life than a “perfect” relationship with another human being.

§§   I love this. I think of this as inner sovereignty.

§§  I have found that as much as I try, wish and will myself to be defined by my own self, it ends as badly as when I define myself for others. I discovered that ‘myself’ was something that had elements to it that I may not always appreciate, or at times even detest, but I cannot simply force them away. Once I realized that, I began to discover all of myself…and allow me to be something beyond my original reckoning…and far more peaceful.

§§   I unplug.  I turn off all social media stuff and spend time with myself or others that I know truly love and accept me.  That way I can remember who I am, and not have to be anything for anyone.  It is such relief.

<<thanks to our dear community for thoughtful and unique responses – such wisdom and beauty!>>


Community ~ Ask & Respond

self sabotage.jpg

FOR CONSIDERATION: “I am constantly watching for the ways I self sabotage myself and prevent myself from showing up to my family and the world. I love shadow-work for looking compassionately at myself and behaviors and honestly discerning what needs nourishing and what needs to be let go of.”

RESPONSE(S):

§§   Good point!! I feel if more of us, would pay attention to ways we self sabotage, we would less often do it, speaking of myself!! I think, when we are truly seeking equality amongst ourselves, consistently, and not focusing on only ourselves, we collectively have the power to make lasting, beneficial change!! In my own experience, behaviors that are consistently self destructive, never are satiated, no matter the level of so called nourishment I provide them. Once I recognize an issue that consumes well more than it provides, I soon realize that it’s time to let go, in many cases, not just for my benefit, but the benefit of the other party/parties involved!!

§§    The way in which I find I sabotage myself is by allowing the negative thoughts that I have take over my mind. Once these I let these thoughts get out of hand I struggle to regain control over them.  

§§   When I see myself sabotaging myself I start by not beating myself up. That alone was a huge change for me. Then I had to start with these words: “I am me. I love me.” Those are strange words for a grandmother to say to herself, but that is where I need to start, with acceptance. I struggle with this daily and have not found an answer, although I tell myself to try again. Start over. And keep laughing!

§§   I can be rather good at seeing the shadows within me that affect the way I move about the world, and I often detect ways in which I could ‘do better.’ What I lack is patience. Patience to see, and let it be. Patience to seed, and let it grow. Patience to know, until it becomes wisdom; sometimes it is time to nourish, sometimes let go, and sometimes…just be. My own sabotage generally reveals a deeper root issue when I allow compassion for my own messy-humanity…to see without fixing…the solution is usually just beyond my sight: patiently waiting for me in my future.

§§   I do not usually do anything.  I’m ok with being how I am and trusting that things will work themselves out when they need to.  I never expect me to be perfect and so it seems I worry less than others about how ‘good’ they are.  This is an attribute I feel many could find useful in their lives: being good, just as they are.

<<thanks to our dear community for thoughtful and unique responses – such wisdom and beauty!>>


SOAPBOX!

Following are your soapbox thoughts!

soapbox.jpg

 <<y’all should get on that damn box more often! 🙂 >>

Serve love! Be the change you wish to see!

 

Grateful to know the problem lies within me and I have the ability to fix it if I understand that. As long as I believe the problem lies elsewhere, I am a prisoner to the problem. If I understand my problems are of my own making, I am master of them. I can choose to address them or live with them…


THOUGHTFUL

reading in nature

 

Following are a few thoughtful thoughts:  

  • Have I or do I struggle to define myself based on societal norms? religious norms? family norms? personal norms?
  • How important is acceptance by others? 
  • Can aspects of me reamin undefined?
  • Do I have a method of seeking my own inner clarity?
  • Do I self-sabotage?  <<inside joke for my daughter…hch: insert lousy comment here 😉 >> 
    • If yes, when do I usually self-sabotage?
  • Do I understand the root issue of my self-sabotage?
  • Do I feel I need to stop a habitual self-sabotage?
    • If yes, do I understand how to start-the-end of the habit?

meditation of love
All blessings and tinkling bells of honey to your heart.

 

 

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